A teary Monday night

I did not know what came over me last night.

Will he ever get married? Will he graduated from school of art? Will he excel in life? Will he get a job?

AM I IN DENIAL, still?  Should I be asking these questions if I accept him the way he is?

“Aiza… Can I ask you something? Do you accept him as he is? With ADHD? Accept him for who he really is?”

and my answer was…. “OF COURSE!!!” (after a long pause) and I cried. That was my answer.

Who can I talk to? or more of who can just sit with me for 1/2 hour in silence? No one, full stop. Not for now I think.  Who can really understand and feel me? No one.. just no one.  Am I struggling alone? Physically, no.  Do I share my son’s KPI with my partner? I’m not sure. I can’t really tell.

It is sad looking at his low muscle tone. How he sometimes struggle with some sensory issues; either overload or under load.  Picky eater he is.😦  I assigned him for tennis class and it seems to go okay for a while.  Let’s hope he can survive in the neurotypical kids surrounding.

Alhamdulillah, his speech embarks to a whole new level now.  He is more expressive. We are now on Reconnect Kit protocol by Young Living .  It works well with him.

Thank you Allah swt for sending us an online friend- Marissa Ali. She is an angel. Helps me a lot (she might not realise this but TQ so much Marissa Ali).  Not only she helps me with my oiling part, but with knowledge sharing sessions.  I can’t afford to repay her for all the oils and stuffs you gave my son; and the most important thing- the encouraging words you gave me.

O, heart! Please be strong and be kind.


Aiza Jasmi,An ADHD Mom

I have to STOP calling my son ‘hyper’

Some people refuse to label, I am not pre-label but label helps us to view the full potential, the hiccups we should be expecting and frankly, labels help us to guide azfar better.

Telling, saying, calling my son is with ADHD is not labeling him with disadvantages or disabilities.  I know deep in my heart somehow the ‘dis’ is there😦.  From now on, I MUST stop calling him that. I must be calling him by his advantages.

My azfar is

a happy boy…

good singer




into drawings

loves architectures…

These are the values I need to focus on. Rather than focusing on his weakness, I must be valuing his positive qualities.🙂


Aidilfitri-a big challenge for me!

Azfar Hazim is currently facing some sensory overload!!! ARGHHHH.. I am the one who really need to calm down. not him.  Can’t blame him for the overloadness :((

One reason why I do not visit friends and families on Hari Raya (not unless they understand azfar’s situation) is because he can be very sensitive to his surroundings- especially smells, clusters, toys, curtain colours and even to the extend not aligned photo frames.  Last year, we went to a house, and azfar pointed out a painting at my friend’s house…. ‘Ummi..tu..salah tu…’ . Everybody looked and realised that painting was tilted to the left. Oh dear darling! *face palm*  Everybody praised him , but I felt sorry for the host..🙂 hehehehe.

This photo is just an example. Azfar parks his bike at the same spot, hang his helmet on the right side of the handle and he does that every single time we’re off to the playground. OCD meh? erkkk..2015124083246

Berbudi kepada tanah!

Alhamdulillah, fresh from my garden🙂  Hand-picked, homegrown and they are organic!  Cabai Melaka (bird eye chillies), they are super duper hot but, I love it.

I try to maximise my afterwork time with my kids; we do 1/2 hour gardening-making sure their hands get dirty, cycling and some running session. Azfar really needs the sensory input whenever he can and whenever I possibly can. So, this is partly his not-so-much sensory input.

Our next project will be some garden beds from the recycled wooden door.  #nofilter #cabaimelaka #cabaiburung #berbudikepadatanah

Cabai Melaka

Cabai Melaka